First off I would like to wish everyone a "happy" new year. I hope this year brings as much peace and fulfillment that can be brought to those of us on this journey.
I am a little cautious on seeing how this year without Lilly will be "different" from 2011. I have heard people say that some years are harder than others and I feel I defintely experienced that in 2011. My wish is that 2012 will not be one of the "harder" years for myself and especially for others.
I feel like I experienced the deepest part of my despair in missing Lilly and though I know there will be more moments during my lifetime like this I have yet to experience I just want to make sure I never lose sight of the one thing I have said from the beginning that I do not want Lilly's death to be bigger than her life! I get so mad when I lose my grip on that thought.
I feel I was very close to losing sight of that in 2011. So here I start another year living without Lilly. May all of us who walk this journey find as much peace and joy that can be found. Though the tears will never cease and the heartache never end, may we all find some comfort in the year 2012. I have a feeling all our children want that for us. *hugs*